One of the biggest mistakes some parents and teachers make, when they
decide to do Positive Discipline, is becoming too permissive because
they don’t want to be punitive. Some mistakenly believe they are being
kind when they rescue their children, and protect them from all
disappointment. This is not being kind; it is being permissive. Being
kind means to be respectful of the child and of yourself. It is not
respectful to pamper children. It is not respectful to rescue them from
every disappointment so they don’t have the opportunity to develop their
disappointment muscles. It is respectful to validate their feelings, "I
can see that you are disappointed (or angry, or upset, etc.)." Then it
is respectful to have faith in children that they can survive disappointment and develop a sense of capability in the process.
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